“Fall Seven Times, Stand Up Eight.”
(This post first appeared in February, 2011)
Why should setbacks or failures be reasons to give up?
The title of this post comes from a Japanese proverb. Those words say it all.
There are some days, I admit, when I see little except for a gray existence ahead for me. At 67, I wonder if I will ever fulfill my life’s dream to become a published author. I fear that I will never find security in my old age. The aches and creaks of age wear me down. And I fall into “stinking thinking” that I’ll never find my way back up again.
None of this lasts for long. I don’t let it.
I can’t waste time on negative feelings. Rather, I have to use the next years of my life to accomplish as much as I can.
We all have our gray days. As we get older, we may feel age has caught up with us and overtaken our dreams to achieve what we set out to do. Maybe there isn’t enough time left, or we’re just too old, physically unable, mentally unwilling, or tired.
On the other hand, if we’re interested in the world and passionate about certain subjects, then we can still accomplish what we set out to do.
History and the arts are full of men and women who made surprising comebacks, achieved greatness, or who revived/had prominent careers at an age when most would have given up. And there must be a myriad of other less known or unrecorded cases.
“Never give in, never give in, never; never; never; never – in nothing, great or small, large or petty – never give in.”
Winston Churchill, after an up and down career, and ten years as a political pariah or, as he put it, “Out in the wilderness” during the 1930s, returned at 66 to serve as a wartime Prime Minister in 1940. His leadership and great speeches helped inspire the nation’s morale against the would-be Nazi invaders that were pummeling the cities and coast of England. He told the people of England, “If you are going through Hell, keep going.”
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”
Nelson Mandela, an anti-apartheid activist in white dominated South Africa, was sentenced to life imprisonment in 1962 and served 27 years, 18 as a classification D prisoner – the lowest scale – in the notorious Robben Island Prison. Released in 1990, he returned to lead his party in negotiations that led to multi-racial democracy in 1994. He was 72 when he became South Africa’s first democratically elected South African president in 1994.
“You’ll never find a better sparring partner than adversity.”
Golda Meir came to the U.S. from Russia at the age of 8, and was brought up in Milwaukee, WI. In 1921, she emigrated to Palestine where she worked on a kibbutz and as a teacher before moving up in the political ranks. At 71, she became Prime Minister of the State of Israel in March, 1979. The world’s third woman to be head of state (after Shri Lanka and India), she was portrayed as the “strong-willed, straight-talking, gray-bunned grandmother of the Jewish people.”
“I made a resolve that I was going to amount to something if I could.”
Colonel Sanders started Kentucky Fried Chicken at 65 when his restaurant folded and because his pension was so small; after two years, he went on to wild success. A Kentucky Colonel (in-name military designation only), he gave the chain an image by dressing up in that all-white southern gentleman garb.
“Painting’s not important. The important thing is keeping busy.”
Grandma Moses (Anna Mary Robertson Moses) didn’t begin to paint until the age of 76, when her hands became too crippled by arthritis to hold an embroidery needle and she found herself with nothing to do. She’s usually cited for succeeding for the first time at her art work in her nineties and up to her death at 101. Her paintings were shown at the Museum of Modern Art in New York City as well as in museums in Vienna and Paris.
“I never had a great role in a great film.”
Gloria Stuart, a movie actress in the 1930s, returned from obscurity at 86 when she landed the role of 100-year-old Rose in James Cameron’s “Titanic.” She remains the oldest person ever nominated for an Oscar. The above quote must have been before “Titanic.”
“You cannot just waste time. Otherwise you’ll die to regret …”
Harriett Doerr finished her Stanford degree at 67. In 1983, at 73, she became a darling of the literary world with the publication of her first novel, “Stones for Ibarra,” which went on to win a National Book Award.
“If I had not lived until I was 90, I would not have been able to write this book. God knows what other potentials lurk in other people who keep going into old age.”
Harry Bernstein published a short story when he was 24, in 1934, but it was not until he was 96 that his well-received debut novel, “The Invisible Wall” was published. Bernstein turned to fiction only after his wife of 67 years died, as therapy for his loss and loneliness. He published two more books after his debut.
“If I had known at the beginning of my life that this is where I would get to, I would have said, “Not possible.”
Jessica Tandy, a well-respected actress came out of a career slump in the mid 1980s to a career revival in her seventies when she won both a Tony Award and an Emmy Award for her role in “Foxfire.” She became the oldest actress to receive the Academy Award for Best Actress for her role in “Driving Miss Daisy” in 1989. 
There are many other such stories of late life success that I’d have liked to include but then I’d have to write an e-book about them. It’s a fascinating subject – what drove these men and women to not give up despite rejection, imprisonment, lack of education or opportunity, sexism, ageism, defeat … you name it.
Do you know of someone who “made it” late in life, particularly after overcoming problems, losses, rejection, or other setbacks?
If you do, please share their stories with us.
Tags: Adversity, Ageism, Colonel Sanders, Determination and perseverance, Gloria Stuart, Golda Meir, Grandma Moses, Harriet Doerr, Harry Bernstein, Jessica Tandy, Late life success, Life challenges and motivations, Nelson Mandela, Never give up, Overcoming Obstacles, Wartime Prime Minister of Great Britain, Winston Churchill
This entry was posted on Saturday, July 30th, 2011 at 5:10 pm and is filed under Ageism, Facing Obstacles in Life, Growing old, Life Challenges, Mid life motivations, Midlife professional challenges, never give up, Overcoming Setbacks or Failures. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
22 Responses to ““Fall Seven Times, Stand Up Eight.””
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Wonderful quotes.
I think psychology is poised to begin to answer some of these questions. After centuries of focusing on what’s wrong, the new positive psychology is focusing on what’s right. Books like the latest fom Seligman – Flourish – offer interesting and valuable perspectives. Flourish, resilience, optimism – big ideas.
Thom,
Interesting that you would mention psychology as poised to answer some of these questions. I’m also interested in society answering them. I agree that that Flourish, resilience, and optimism have to be big, also it’s a matter of attitude, health, and sometimes just being in the right place at the right moment.
I’ve a very dear friend who will be ninety in August. Her husband died unexpectedly when her children were small (about four, six and seven…something like that). They lived on the family farm which the four kept going for several years as she managed to teach at the same time and continue to educate herself even more. She taught a class at the high school level called Bittersweet where the young people produced a magazine about the elderly people in the Ozarks and their disappearing lifestyles. She taught them to do ALL of the work themselves (choosing their subjects, arranging interviews, taking part in the projects, writing, revising, printing and the whole publication process) and the magazine was a huge success for about ten years, until she retired. She has written herself for many years, dreaming of bigger and bigger successes, and her motto is “never never never give up”. The result has been (since her retirement)that she has published around a dozen novels for Avon, a biography about a wonderful woman here in the Ozarks who had been ignored up until the book was published, several novels about the Civil War . . .not to mention numerous short stories to anthologies. This has ALL been done in her later years. During the month of September she will have her name on five books: two reprints of Civil War novels (Brothers Blue and Grey and Enemies Blue and Grey); as author of collected essays between the covers of a non-fiction book (Footprints in the Ozarks); as editor (and contributing author) of another (Mysteries of the Ozarks, Vol III)[she edited the first two volumes as well as the upcoming Vol IV)], and as editor of a fantastic collection of family letters from the World War II era (Our Robin is Read). This woman, Ellen Gray Massey, of Lebanon, MO, is a fantastic person and an author to emulate, one to use as an example for any aspiring writer and I highly recommend her. She has been my mentor for a long time as well as a good friend. A humble woman and unassuming, still she has never allowed the world or circumstances to stand in the way of her goals. As I said before, her motto is “Never, never give up.” As you can see, it really works.
Hi Betty,
Thanks for telling me about Eleanor Gray Massey. She seems to be a great example of precisely what I am writing about. You have given me a fair amount of information about her and I will Google her, but it occurs to me that maybe I could write a blog post about her. Since she has been your mentor, I imagine that you know her personally as I would love to contact her. That motto must have been adopted by many people as the late Elle Newmark, also a writer (blog post, Better Later than Early) quoted it as well, and I use it a lot.
I think it is so important to not be defined by what happens in our lives but rise above circumstances. If your circumstances happen to be age then what is age. I do recall a story I read about the oldest flight attendant. This woman in America had a burning ambition to be a flight attendant and she acheived it in mature years. I cant recall exactly what but it was in her 60s.
With life expectancy increasing we all may live to be well into our 90s, well and active – so what are we to do with it, wait to die. I think not. Go after what you achieve in life Pennie, its never too late.
Maureen,
You just said it. Go after what you can achieve in life – whatever your age. I can just imagine that flight attendant who, when she was young probably encountered too many obstacles – I know having worked in the airline business for a while. If she could do it, whether she was 50 or 60, I take my hat off to her. It used to be a supposedly glamorous job, but now it’s become just hard work with grueling hours, demanding and rude passengers, and mainly milk runs. Also, it takes a huge physical toll. So kudos to her and anyone who realizes their life’s ambition late in life.
Great stories and great quotes! Thanks.
Josie x
This is SO inspiring!! Thank you for sharing your story, as well as the success stories of the others. It’s really difficult when we feel like we’re running out of time or as you wrote, ‘the mind and body are already tired or unwilling’. I am beginning to feel that and I’m not even 40yet….sad huh? But this piece reminds me to focus on what I have, still have and just make the most of it! THANK YOU! With your gifts, I am certain you will still achieve much
)
Joy,
Thank you for your wonderful comment. Believe me, at 43, I began to feel old and that I couldn’t keep up with the generation of newly minted MBAs. So I retreated for a while, retrenched, made another comeback, and in a way, set my course for doing this kind of thing for the rest of my life. All of the people I mentioned in this post had to overcome some midlife obstacle or downturn and make a late life comeback. So you may still have many achievements ahead of you.
Thanks for this post! I don’t know if it counts as a story, but my 91-year old grandmother had her driving licence at 60…
I think that it is important to put ourselves in a positive mindset, whatever our age is!
Muriel,
I couldn’t agree more. Positive mindset or attitude is everything. Your grandmother sounds like quite a personality. I bet she did a lot more than just get her license at 60. Shows initiative.
This was such a thoroughly inspiring post, Pennie! The stories that stood out for me were those of Grandma Moses, Harriett Doer and Harry Bernstein. Reading these tidbits truly fill my heart with such hope that I can accomplish anything I want to and that there should never be timeframes for success and achievement.
I also really admire how you say, “I can’t waste time on negative feelings.” That solid statement is one that I want to live by as well. I don’t want negative feelings to even play a part in my life. Now that I think about it, I’ve been having slight nightmares about being fired by my freelance client even though everything’s going well. I’ve just heard so much about how freelancing can be so unpredictable, especially from Sherry. But I’m going to make a commitment to harbor your attitude. I’ll treasure these moments as they are and take life as it comes, pushing away the negativity to allow the positivity and joy to enter. Thanks so much for being so encouraging and supportive, Pennie!
Penelope, is the goal to have a publishing house pick it up? Or would it be so bad to do it yourself? If not, self publish and get that book out there! Then, gosh darn it, promote and market it yourself. That may be enough to get the ball rolling to traditional publishing or if not, your incredible story will at least have a wider audience. In any event, you are amazing for all you have accomplished so far, right now!
Adriene,
Thanks for the compliments and yes, you took the words – or the intentions – right out of my head. That is precisely where I’m headed though not without one last try at traditional publishing. Believe it or not, this blogging may turn out to be very helpful in that area. At least, I want to find out how true this is before turning to self-publishing and promoting.
Penelope: Thank you for the inspiring article! This is my first time to your blog, but I will most certainly be adding it to my bookmarks for further visits. I loved all the quotes, but the ones that stood out to me the most were that of Grandma Mosses & Harriett Doerr.
I believe you should never give up on your dreams if they are within reach. If your dream is to become a professional athlete after a certain age that’s just one of the few dreams you have to give up on. Most dreams don’t have an age barrier.
It’s hard not to give up or give in to the temptation to of quitting, but if you quit it’ll quickly turn into a life habit. Becoming a quitter is not something you want to turn into habit. It’s really only up to use to make our dreams come true before we leave this earth. It’s all about staying determined and not letting life’s everyday negativity get in your way.
Keep up the good work!
God bless,
William Veasley
Hi William,
Wonderful seeing you here. I have seen a few of your comments on Stu’s and Rob’s posts and was about to check out your blog as well.
You make some excellent comments here. Even a dream about becoming a professional athlete can and has worked for some older people in their 50s and 60s – though it depends on what they are trying to do as some things are definitely out of bounds.
I agree about not becoming a quitter. I’ve never been a quitter – except in marriage – and am the type of person who will always finish a book that I start to read or write, or a course that I take, or similar that requires time and involvement, which I often don’t have. So negativity is not on my agenda though occasionally those thoughts do creep in. I love that you say, it’s really only up to us to make our dreams come true before we leave the earth. That is my intention and more, my focus and my goal.
These are great examples. If I were to choose one personal trait I think it would be to have a positive outlook. It makes life easier and enables the ability to never give up. After that, the lucky break is required. Great post. Hang on in there!
Hi Muriel,
You are so right. It’s the positive outlook that makes all the difference. You definitely have one – I can tell from your whimsical, humorous writing. As for the lucky break, well, I’ll hang in there as long as I have life, and a positive outlook.
Since I am the younger sister of Ellen Gray Thornton, I enjoyed reading what our friend Betty said about her. When we were children Ellen didn’t let me give up on learning to turn a backward somersault until I finallly learned it. So she spent her whole life making other people stick with it.
She harassed me into being published myself in my 70s so it does work even though I no longer turn somersaults.
Hi Carolyn,
I’m so happy to hear from you and also learn more about Ellen. She sounds like a fantastic person and I certainly want to learn more about her – and probably from her.
Congratulations on getting published in your 70s. I have to hear more about your journey to that achievement. You sound like quite a personality yourself.
Please keep in touch.
Hi Penelope,
A good post and one folks of all ages need to hear. People have been taught to give up by the age of 22! Yes, you can keep going on the linear path, but the other ones have DO NOT ENTER signs on them.
Check out my guest blogger’s post. It will give you a boost. He says we don’t devote enough time and effort to solving our problems. It’s so true. I wanted to get my legs back into shape, yet all i did was walk a few miles a day. Then I started doing physique 57, pilates and now yoga. Still have a way to go but I can see the improvement!
If you want to get your book published. Work on that vision every day. What can I do today to get my book published?
thank, G.
Hi Giulietta,
Thanks for the great advice especially in that last sentence. I will definitely check out your guest blogger’s post especially since I’m not sure if I agree with how you describe it here.I think a lot of people spend too much time trying to solve their problems, both real and imagined, and that in itself can be a problem. Maybe it’s a matter of the correct focus, which ties into what you are doing now and what you recommend that I do. It’s probably the only way to achieve my goal.